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(I’m guessing that the fact that if Paris married Dru, her name would be Paris Hilton, is unintentional - but I wouldn’t commit to a wager on it.) It may be realistic, but this isn’t a film that exactly trades in realism regardless, it’s a dubious message to send to youthful viewers.īut all that to one side, the movie is an utter nightmare of bad first-year-film-school technique from director Beyer, who uses focus-shifts and “clever” camera placements with such pointless abandon that it makes your head hurt. There’s little room for doubt that Paris didn’t snare her big catch - NBA star Dru Hilton (Elimu Nelson, Love & Sex) - by engaging in marathon Parcheesi matches with him. Then there’s the question of the casually accepted level of teen sex presented in the film, especially given Love Don’t Cost a Thing‘s presumed 12-to-17-year-old target audience. Both incarnations are pretty offensive, though the fact that his playa is somewhat less believable than Jamie Kennedy in Malibu’s Most Wanted probably tips the scales in the nerd direction.Ĭhristina Milian comes off slightly better (but only slightly), though much of the problem with her character lies in the writing, which is simply not very good. It’s a toss-up as to whether he’s more embarrassing as a caricature nerd, or as a caricature playa. While Cannon is an innately likable screen presence, he doesn’t exactly shine here as an actor. Yes, we’ve seen it all before, and doubtless we’ll see it all again - though I’m not sure we can hope to ever see it any worse. The idea is that this will wash away his nerd status and make him one of the “cool people.” Of course, he’s going to fall in love with her and vice versa, but not before he becomes an arrogant jerk and alienates both her and his old nerd friends.
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Alvin Johnson (Nick Cannon, Drumline) makes a deal with popular cheerleader Paris Morgan (Christina Milian, American Pie): He’ll fix the car she wrecked before her mother returns from a trip if she’ll pose as his girlfriend for two weeks. The plots are identical in nearly every other respect. Otherwise, the level of creativity extends to such world-astounding changes as making the lead a nerdy pool boy instead of a nerdy lawn boy. Original screenwriter Michael Swerdlick (of sitcoms like Who’s the Boss? and Doogie Howser, M.D.) and co-writer/director Troy Beyer have exactly one “inspiration” - to take the suburban, white-bread concept and make the characters middle- and upper-middle-class blacks. This new version adds 11 minutes - and nothing else, except tedium. Though nothing special, it was harmless and agreeable enough, and had the good sense to be a scant 94 minutes. The original was lightweight enough, and mostly notable as Patrick Dempsey’s big-break film. High on the list of Questions That Need Answering is this puzzler: Who actually thought it necessary to remake an already paper-thin 1987 teen comedy called Can’t Buy Me Love?